I found myself many times trapped in my thoughts and it got me by surprise to realize when something changed. When did that happen? I put so much hope in dreams and my wishes got so strong, that I ended up in false realities. The reality was only one, but from a different perspective made it looked unlike from each angle. I created my reality based on my values, beliefs and experiences and was almost impossible to clarify my feelings to other people. It was like my memories had amnesia and didn’t come in order, they either fell in an avalanche or were too sporadic to even put two of them together and made sense of it. However, I did a great effort to keep my dreams pristine and not interfere with others’ set of beliefs that would diminish my purpose. I was just a passenger through time for a little while and every time that passed was a lost one never to be recovered, and everything I wished and never happened was a missed opportunity, never to be achieved. Lacking the basics, time, and purpose, I had a single route to take: forward. Wishes were lost, desires missed, time vanished, and I had to keep on going hoping for the better. Ridiculous! Why even bother if nothing worked and everything just collapsed like tower cards? What were the chances that manifestation really worked and no additional loss would cause destruction and make another moment disappear in that hole of time?

“Everyone creates realities based on their own personal beliefs. These beliefs are so powerful that they can create [expansive or entrapping] realities over and over.”

― Hope Bradford

“Dare to dream!” Who dared make such a statement in the first place? How could an imaginary dream be transformed into reality and materialize a wish? How could a fictional version of my life be transformed into the ideal one? Was possible a world where no limitations or some kind of oppression existed? If would be that simple and a dream would come true after a night of rest, probably I would be still sleeping, without being terrified by nightmares and the monsters under my bed. That was impossible for me in my life on Earth because I couldn’t have a quiet night and a peaceful dream, in a world where dark shadows walked behind me as personal unpaid guards. I was hunted by failures, I woke up looking for answers, and I spent the time waiting for the dawn to come, and bring a little bit of light into my days. I left behind a heavy coat of burdens and I walked naked and barefoot on the path of the unknown every day, vulnerable and exposed to so much hate. I headed where there were no secrets or regrets, but I took the opposite direction because I was afraid to confront my breakdowns and what I left behind. I chose the path that took me through the road with thorns and broken glass. It was so easy to fall back on disappointment even though theoretically making it possible was advertised as so easy to achieve. I was trapped in those illusions and I chased dreams like butterflies with a broken net, hoping that one day I would succeed. Hell no, I would not! I wake up the next day with the same dreams and a new unknown day, with less time to achieve my goals and limited hopes gathered in my soul. It never felt that painful to shrink my fantasies to a size of a mustard seed.

“Dare to dream! If you did not have the capability to make your wildest wishes come true, your mind would not have the capacity to conjure such ideas in the first place. There is no limitation on what you can potentially achieve, except for the limitation you choose to impose on your own imagination. What you believe to be possible will always come to pass – to the extent that you deem it possible. It really is as simple as that.”

― Anthon St. Maarten

I walked and talked until there were no steps to take and no more words to say. I was fighting with my insecurities inside my head and I successfully failed once I wanted to put them all in order in the chaos that surrounded me. There was an echo of my screams returning all the time to remind me that it was not over yet. There was a storm in my eyes that seemed to never stop and those calmer water would not return soon. There was a lost dream that kept on hunting me and nothing could replace those sleepless nights. There was no hope in those hands that held together for so long the praying and I needed to let it go. To be able to disconnect and make sense of the disruption all over me, I needed to shut down all the switches and connect to the silence within me. It took me a while for all the noise to settle down and to adjust to discomfort, but time adjusted for me, and had patience when I need it. When silence settled and everything was disconnected, what came was the power of manifestation. Dreams got organized in alphabetical order, wishes became realistic and with good intentions, and my actions met the highest expectations, the wheel of attractions started to spin. In that circular rotation, attracting like a magnet everything paired with my intentions, my attitude, my focus, and my consciousness. In that peaceful state of mind, the storm that created borders around me was not causing dizziness anymore, just awakened my awareness and left me to receive what was meant to bring me happiness, wealth, health, and love. I got myself in a new storm, however, a storm of flowers was not the same as one of the angry wasps, and even though my life still went through bumpy roads, the path I created in my solitude and silence brought the manifestation that I couldn’t achieve in chaos and disturbance. With different tools and a new mindset, my road ahead wasn’t looking so disturbing anymore, at least that was how I perceive it, and I knew that t finally happened! But when did it happen? When was that moment in time that switched from chaos to peace? I never found out, but I was happy that I could make it happen! Try it and let me know that you made it happen for yourself!

“When you connect to the silence within you, that is when you can make sense of the disturbance going on around you.”

― Stephen Richards

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